what messes us up

My friend Fran referenced this quote on Facebook:

What screws us up most in life is the picture in our head of how it is supposed to be.

I immediately saw in this how I relate to my job. I have certain expectations about how things should be at work. Those expectations are not met. I am, therefore, unhappy.

I validated this with my spiritual director. She added that it is a lot of work to keep holding up an image of how things “should” be and comparing that to how things are. Certainly keeping this in mind does not remove all stress from work, but it helps.

Of course there are times when we should have a picture in our head of how it is supposed to be. Like when there is social injustice and inequality that needs to be fixed. But in the case of my job not having expectations means not being unhappy because expectations are not met.


One Comment on “what messes us up”

  1. Tahoe Mom says:

    Had a friend tell me once that it was better to have preferences rather than expectations. I find that to be very helpful.


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